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Saturday, 29 April 2017

Silly Mummy...


Silly Mummy! She was doing some choppy stuff in the kitchen. She had done the carrots and dutifully given me the strips and knobby ends to dispose of. Then she got some things that look like fat white carrots. She did the same thing to them to make strips from the outside. I didn't like those strips though so they went in the bin. Then she got a kind of box thing with shiny sides. Those shiny sides had different patterns on them. I was watching her very carefully. She started scraping one of the white carrot-things down one of the sides. It was making the white carrot get shorter and a pile of little slivers of it were appearing underneath. Then, all of a sudden, she stopped the scraping thing and said 'Chip. Chip. Chip'. Well....I think that was what it sounded like anyway..... I searched the floor but couldn't find any evidence of those yummy yellowish sticks. I did find blobs of red stuff though......

Mum now has a funny sticky thing that smells strange wrapped around her pawpointer. She seems to have made several of them go all red before she has settled on this last one staying that kind of pinky-sandy colour.

Silly silly Mummy! She is just so daft sometimes!

Today's workywalkies was a mixed bag - into town - 'Find the bank' - no problem! A triumphant bum-bounce when we got inside. I needed confirmation of my cleverness! That made several human mouths turn up at the corners! I like it when that happens! It makes my tail go all waggly! It got me a couple of yummies too! Heehee! Then we went off on a longish route just for the pleasure of going walkies (just Mum and me - Dad had gone off earlier). We went via Northcroft Park and that meant I got a short but wonderful freerun. Mum was a meanie though; she recalled me and got me back into work mode and harness before I got as far as the river! Huff! Then we walked back along the towpath, around town again and into Tesco's.
During this, the sky started leaking. Mum said I was a right sulkysocks for slowing down and plodding just because of a drop of water. Well, I didn't want water dripping on me - I wanted to go swim in it! She just doesn't understand!

When we got back to floatyboatyhome I got a lovely couple of hours lying out on the grass doing some serious work on a brand new, huge juicy bone! Yummmmmmmy!

Friday, 28 April 2017

... And ... Relax!

This has to be the best possible position to be in after an almost 5 mile workywalkies and with Mum now fully occupied with her clicketyfingerstoy.

Photo of my shnozzle - nostrils pointing upwards, head buried between Mum's legs on the sofa. zzzzzzz.

Wednesday, 26 April 2017

All Meeted and Greeted Out...


Visits and visitors. That has been the order of today!

First of all though, Daddy once again abandoned me. I am sure he is making a big mistake every morning. I'm certain he is shutting the door sooner than he means to. Surely he doesn't intend to leave me on the INside when he goes out. At least he doesn't seem to stay gone for very long. I survived his absence again this morning. When he came back, he changed his fursubstitutes and had his brekkie, then I took Mummy workywalkies around to the other side of town. Then Daddy came and picked us up in the car. We went a little way to a huge humanbigpuppyclasses place. Mum says it was called Newbury College. Inside we met a ladyhuman, Naomi, we know from church. She took us to a room where we meeted and greeted some very special humans. Each one of them had a workyperson with them. Some of them stayed away a bit from me and some came to fuss me. I just instinctively knew that they needed my gentle loves. They didn't do any yacketying like most humans do but I don't need that! I just know how to be with them. One yound ladyhuman sat down on the floor with me and gave me some glorious belly tickles! I did eventually have to roll back the right way up though. We couldn't stay forever! Naomi took us back to the 'find the way out' doors and we got back into the car.

Next visit was to a shop with another nice fuss-giver ladyhuman workyperson inside. This was good because the shop had no enticing smells in it. Just rolls and rolls and rolls of all sorts of different fursubstitute stuff.

I then had to guide Mum aaaaallll the way through to the other side of town again - to the bestest shop in the world. AND Mum let me lead her inside! We met a nice ladyhuman in there who yacked with Mum about food for me. Then she gave me a yummy big biccie. (with Mum's permission first). The food came from a white cold cupboard.

Upon return home to our floatyboatyhome, Mum put two blocks of that food into the white very cold cupboard and one into a box on the worktop. She said it needed to thaw out. I got a yummy big carrot for my goodboywork.

A short while later our first visitor arrived aboard. It was Graham from the boat that we used to live alongside. Greetings over, I just snoozed while the inevitable yacketying went on.

The next visitors were much more exciting though. One in particular: Lilly the golden labrador from another floatyboatyhome. Oh....and her humanmum and humandad Sue and Andy. I think I did greet the humans but Oooooooh.....it was lovely to have a fellow pooch to share my water bowl. Of course, aboard a narrowboat, there isn't much room to romp or play but we did manage some kanoodling!

Mum sitting on a chair behind me, lying on the floor in the room in Newbury College.

Delicious bellytickles from Naomi and the very special bellytickler young ladyhuman.

More bellytickles from that young ladyhuman plus a young manhuman who plucked up courage to come and tickle me too.

Tuesday, 25 April 2017

I'm Officially a Smartybum!


Daddy left me this morning. I got my breakfast super duper early but then he abandoned me! Apparently he went to drive a big upstairsdownstairs bus to take a whole load of minihumans to their humanpuppyclasses.

Most of the day was spent chilling out on my sofabed with Mum (she was busy clicketyfingersing for most of the time). Then, when Daddy came back, we all went workywalkies to Lidl's before returning for more sofatime.

Then, this evening, Daddy left me again! I had my dinner and then took Mummy workywalkies on a new route. Daddy had told her which way to go beforehand. We didn't just go out on a random wander! The first bit of the route was familiar - far too familiar! I had the horrible thought that we were just going to Dullelm. Thankfully, we walked past it and kept going. Phew! I had to guide Mum along the busy road (well...the pavement beside the busy road. Then I had to 'find the crossing' and 'hup touch' the button. Mum was really impressed because I actually managed to press the button for her! Heehee! We went across that first bit of the road when the little knob twirled in Mum's pawpointers to tell her it was safe to go. Then, at the next bit of the crossing, we stood there in the middle of the road for ages because the twirler wasn't working. Mum had to listen very carefully for a safe gap in the traffic. I checked too that it was safe before we went across. The last bit had a working twirler so that was OK. Then we were on completely new territory. We have never walked that way before. I did recognise where we were though. We were heading to the place where we usually go on a Tuesday evening on the big bus. Mum tried to do a dafty by going down the wrong turning. I stopped and gave her my bestest 'No Mum, not that way' look. She got the message and said 'OK smartybum, find the way'. Of course I did! It was the next turning left!

A few minutes after we arrived and greeted Enid and a couple of the maximinihumans that we know from there, Daddy turned up driving the big bus! My tail wagged my bum into quite a wiggle!

It was a little bit scary on the bus this evening. Some of the maximinihumans were rather rowdy and stroppy. I found my youngladyhumanfriends though and I was safe with them. I did want to stay near Mummy too though. She was busy making hot brown waters so I couldn't be right with her. I stayed as close as I could though. At the end, some manhumans arrived in blue flashy neenawcar. They sorted it all out and things went quiet again.

Cuddles with Mum and a munchy cowtail have made it all good and happy again back aboard our cozy floatyboatyhome.

Monday, 24 April 2017

What a Busy Day...

Home again!

It has been quite a day leading up to getting back to our floatyboatyhome though!

First - breakfast in the humankennelblock, then bag packing followed by workywalkies along the pawmenade to that big indoor puddle where Rosie works. Apparently Mum and Dad were there to watch microhuman Hallie having something called a swimming lesson. I didn't get to see. Instead I had to stay with some nice workyhumans in the office. I got to keep their paws warm under their desks. I rather suspect this is another example of doggy superiority - we don't need lessons to learn to swim - we just splash in and get on with it!

Next came a ride in our old car, which now seems to be Rosie's car. I had to share the back seat with Hallie! I was safe though she was securely strapped into a bra that held her in her seat, and she went to sleep soon after we started moving. Phew! We went to Rosie's house where I got to have a good sniff around while Mum and Dad did some 'chores' to help Rosie, who was sitting on the sofa with Hallie still asleep on her. I was safe again!

After that, we went again to visit Papa, where Dad did something with that little box with human voices inside it. Apparently it is to keep Papa safe now that Nanny isn't there to look after him. It seems that if he pressed a little button, those voices inside the box call for neenaw help if he needs it. I just kept myself occupied by hoovering the carrot trimmings he had saved for me! Yummmm!

Next stop was another house where Dad did some yacketying with two other manhumans. There was hissing furball food in a little bowl on the floor but meanie Mummy wouldn't let me near it! Huff! We didn't stay there long and the next stop was fandabbydoozy!

As we drove into the car park, I remembered where we were and this squeak kind of rose up from inside me! Yippppeeee! Lancing Manor Park! A freerun! All the way up the steep hill-field and into the woods called Lancing Ring! It was glorious sniffing territory! And I found a couple of passing buddies to play briefly with.

That was just what I needed before the long journey home to our floatyboat. I was ravenous when we arrived. It was waaaaayyyyy past my dinnertime! I usually have my dinner when the tickydisk says 5.30 but it was nearly 6.30 when we arrived. I just about managed to survive long enough to get aboard the boat!

Now: Sofasnuggles with Mummy.......aaaaaand......relax!

Sunday, 23 April 2017

Lot's of Mini-Humans!


Two freeruns! Now that's what I call a day off! YayyyHayyy!

Actually, I did have to do a little bit of workywalkies this morning. Only a little bit though. i had to take Mum to breakfast in the humankennelblock. There were some of the people there from yesterday's gathering. Of course, I didn't get anything but it was nice lie under the table and keep some human paws warm! I also had to guide Mum into church: the one we used to go to every week when we lived here in Worthing. It was great to meet n greet so many old humanpals. After that, my work was done!

We went back to the humankennelblock but I stayed in the car while Mum & Dad zipped in quickly. They came back with some colourful parcels. Next stop was my first freerun!

We arrived in a car park which made my squeaks escape! I just couldn't contain them! I knew where we were! Rotary Park was a favourite play venue. It was great to revisit today. I even got a couple of brief plays in with passing pooches, including a group of four little tine narrowdogs. Little sausages on tiny legs!

After that very welcome burst of zoomies and loonying around, we went to Rosie and James's house. My first duty was, of course, to hoover the hissing furball's foodbowl! That done, I then realised I was surroundded by microhumans! EEEEEEEKKKKK! There were about six of them! That was scary - but then I noticed that three of them were sitting in those chairs on sticks. That meant there was some serious hoovering duty to be done underneath! I got myself quite a feast! Yummmmmy! These little people are actually quite tasty to follow around - even the ones that weren't contained in chairs were worth following - they were very good at leaving trails of edibles as they moved around!

It seemed that the whole gathering was to do with Hallie, my little human-niece. Something to do with her having a One Day. She spent quite a bit of time ripping colourful flappies off of various things. I tried to join in by ripping a colourful square flappy that was beside Mum's plate. Apparently that wasn't the right thing to do! Oops! Apparently that particular flappy was meant to be used to wipe pawpointers and faces!

I did get to enjoy a chill out time with Mum in the garden while the microhumans were all occupied. That was nice.

After that, we moved on to Papa's home where I got my dinner. I seem to think I was a bit short changed with that. I'm sure there was less in my bowl than usual. Mum said something about all the sausages and other extras I had munched through the afternoon. I think that was mean! Those sausages all needed to be removed from the floor. They weren't really food! Huff!

After a lie down, waiting for Dad to finish installing some squawkybox thing for Papa. (That squawkybox made some strange noises when Papa pressed a button - then a human seemed to be yacking from inside it!), we set off in the car again. This time, the destination, made my squeak even squeakier! Brooklands park! Wayhayhayhayhay! I was sooooo happy! When I leapt out of the car, my paws bounceded me around in crazy circles! Heeheehee! Not only was it a great freerun, but a game of fetch the ball too. Fab fun! Then I met a fantabulous playmate. His name was Merti. A choccy lab same size as me. That meant it was MY party time! Zoomies and rollies and chasies and rompies galore! Merti and I were a superb match for each other. We wore ourselves out good and proper! We ended up having to have a lie down on the cold grass for a while!

I think I can declare that as a pretty good day off!
 
Me lying down on a pink quilt beside Mum in Rosie's garden.

Me having a lie down with Merti.

Saturday, 22 April 2017

Bang Pops.


Thank goodness for workywalkies! I have been really glad to take Mummy out today for a few little outings.

The first one this morning was into town to a couple of shops, then back again. On the way we met some humanfiriends that we used to know in Worthing. That gave me a long time to lie down on the pawmenade while inevitable human yackety-yacking went on.

When we got back to our humankennelblock room, Mum did something really weird: She got out a kind of pointed table thing, laid fursubstitutes on it and then stroked them with a hot shiny-bottomed pointed thingy with a tail that she stuck into the wall! I got out of the way. I didn't fancy being stroked with that!

Next, I got groomed to within an atom of total baldness, then got wiped all over with a damp strokycloth, then my teeth got super scrubbed with a yummy minty whiskerstick. Then I got a new collar. I was exhausted with all this pampering!

After a bit of a snooze time, on went my harness and lead. Great! I thought. Walkies! I thought. Well, I was wrong! We just went next door into another part of the humankennelblock. In there, we found lots of humanfriends, all wearing very smart fursubstitutes. We did a lot of waiting around and the humans did a lot of yacketying of course. I managed to do quite a lot of getting fussed and admired! After a while, we all went very slowly into a big room where there were rows of seats all covered in white with blue and pink twiddlyfluffs wrapped around them. Shortly after we all got settled, a ladyhumanfriend, Ann, came in and walked down the middle of the rows of seats. She was wearing a white fursubstitute. She stood at the front with Pete, a manhumanfiiend. Another lady did some yacketying, Pete put a tag on Ann's pawpointer and they rubbed muzzles.

Everyone then drifted out into the big garden and Dad pointed his one-eyed-clickybox at various combinations of groups of humans. Towards the end of it all I had to lead Mum to the groupe being clicked. Apparently it was very funny that I sat down with my back towards Daddy! I just wanted to watch for the best options for fusses in this crowd! I know what Daddy's clickybox looks like! Why would I want to watch that?!!

Throughout all of this and onwards for the rest of the proceedings, Daddy was very busy with his one-eyed-clickybox.

The rest of the day was spent in another room where there was lots of humans drinking loads of stinkywater of various colours, from various shaped bowls - some on sticks, some not. Some of the stinky water had little dots going upwards inside it. Mum let me sniff it. I was NOT impressed! It made my nose explode! I took Mummy for a very necessary download workywalkies around the block, followed by a quick visit to our room to get my dinner. When we got back into the very busy room, some of the workyhumans got some bottles and made them go bang pop. That was really scary and I hid in a corner. Mum then asked Dad to take me to our room in the kennelblock for a while to chill out a bit. I was glad of that! Mum was worried that I would be really scared when everyone let off something called partypoppers. I think she was right. I really don't like bangs or pops! They are super scary and make me go all shaky!

I am sure I missed out on loads of noshing because, when Mum and Dad came to get me again and I went back into the big room I found a few morsels to hoover under the table! That was good and I was glad to be able to lie down under the table where it was a bit quieter. There was a lot of loud boomboomdingdinging coming from some huge boxes, along with lots of flashing lights. I was OK in my undertable cave, but I was happy to escort Mum out when she was struggling with all the bright flashes.

It was all great to meet and greet so many humans and the bit of hoovering was worth doing. I was definitely glad of the breaks to go workywalkies with Mum and very pleased to take Daddy for a leisure walkies after it all. That was a well appreciated unwind.

Now....Mummy......I know you have treats in that box .....I have been good aaaaaalllll day.........I wuv you Mummy.......I am sitting very nicely now .......If I wag my tail and lick my chops will you please open that box? Please? Pretty please? ......Thank you! Yummmmmm........
 
Me with Ann, Pete and Mum, all in posh fursubstitutes. inside one of the big rooms.

Me sitting next to Ann with a group of humans outside in the garden.

Disgusted!

Yippeeeee! I've set paws on Worthing Beach! Only briefly - and on harness - but it felt so good to have those wobbly pebbly things under my paws again.

It has been a long day - first of all - visitors aboard our floatyboatyhome. That, for me, just meant an extra snooze time while human yacketying went on. Then Daddy disappeared for a while. Apparently he was going to play with some huge toy called a doubledecker. I took Mummy workywalkies into town. When we got back, Daddy was still missing but Mummy got on with some choppy peely stuff in the kitchen. I watched very carefully. She got carrots out of the cold white cupboard. I think she made a mistake though: she put them on the worktop instead on into my bowl. When she did that thing where she scrapes little strips off of them, she did the most despicable thing: She put those yummy strips on the floor! Well! How terrible was that? I gave her my most disgusted sideways glare! That got the situation rectified: She picked them up and dutifully gave them to me one at a time using her pawpointers. Much more satisfactory service! I don't know WHAT she could have been thinking!

Lunch munched, it was time, it seemed, to pack the packed bags into the car. I took the opportunity to dash out to meet my buddy Bella the staffie x labrador neighbour. I kind of get the impression that was not the right thing to do! Dad loaded me into the car and shut me in while he and Mum finished loading everything else in! Hufffff!

This evening's workywalkies made up for it though. It was great to be back on old familiar but long since visited territory......even if I didn't get to explore the beach properly! Mum needed me as it was dark!

Thursday, 20 April 2017

Mummy got it Right Today!

Sainsbury's is less tasty than Tesco! No yummy yogurt hoovering duty to be done there today. Mum still managed to do a whole load of that browsing malarkey though! Not quite as bad as Dullelm yesterday; at least Sainsbury's has a proper aisle in it: the one I managed to steer her to after going around all the other bits. She did do the right thing too; she got me some yummies! Good Mummy!

Wednesday, 19 April 2017

Please may I have a Job as a Cleaner at Tesco?


"Dinky"! That's what Mum keeps saying I am. "A dinky Labrador". Well, I'm not surprised I'm dinky with all this walking! I'm shrinking from the paws upwards! Another almost 6 miles of workywalkies again today. I'm not complaining of course. I could have quite happily done another 6 but I think Mum was a bit ouchy in the paws when we got back to floatyboatyhome.

I had snuck in a few lie-downs during the excursion. Well......Dullelms is not exactly exciting is it? And Mum was taking forever to do her 'browsing' thing. I think it is a bit dark in there and Mum struggles to see what is on the shelves. See! I don't call it DULL elms for no reason! I just whumped down at the end of the aisles and Mum dropped my lead and left me there to cool my belly on the floor while she squinted around. I am pretty sure we had to go up and down EVERY aisle!

Tesco was more interesting. I almost got myself a carrot but Mum rumbled what I was trying to do and that blimmin noseband enabled her to hoik my head away just too soon! Huff. I did get to do some seriously yummy hoovering though when we were in the aisle where the cold shelves are full of pots of yoghurt. Somebody dropped a pot and it exploded across the floor. Well....I couldn't leave such yumminess there for someone to slip over on could I? Mum said I smelled like a strawberry afterwards! The workyladyhuman thought I was fantastic and offered me a job! I think I could cope happily with that kind of cleaning job!

Tuesday, 18 April 2017

Strutted my Stuff Good and Proper Today!

I IS ABSOLUTELY COMPOOPERATED! All workywalkiesded and fusseded out!

It has been a big adventure today! For the first time ever, I got to take Mum on a big outing without Dad. We left Dad behind!

I workywalkied Mum to Newbury Station. We had to wait for ages for Mum to exchange a floppy rectangle for two little rectangles and a few shinydisks. Apparently the little rectangle make the train work: It doesn't go unless everyone on board has these little rectangles. That must be true because everyone else in the queue was getting them too! Once we got them, I had to guide Mum out of the door and along the platform to 'find the train'. Then I had to 'find a seat'. All done, I then squidged myself into a little space between seats and settled down for the ride. We got off when the voice inside the box said we had reached Reading.

Next command was 'find the way out'. No problem! Straight to the big doors, then we had to go find a bus stop. Mum asked somebody for directions. I listened and took Mum straight to the bus stop outside (via a gutter for a necessary squirt down a drain!). We then got on a big bus. The talkybox on the bus that is supposed to tell Mum where we are was working but it was really quiet so she couldn't hear it. We got off at the wrong stop, but a nice manhuman outside pointed us back onto the bus again and told Mum to go to the next stop. We did this and it plonked us right in the middle of Reading Universe City. It was a lovely place with loads of green open spaces. I did hope to get a chance to explore but that wasn't to be. Instead, I had to guide Mum around a maze of walkypaths and to a big building. It was fab to be working in such a completely new environment. Mum was really impressed with me! Hah! Inside that big building was the bestest surprise! Loads of my furry colleagues! Yayyyyhayyyyyy! It was a Guide Dogs Meet & Greet session. |t was fantabulous. Loads of Guide Dogs and Guide Dog Puppies in Training AND loads and loads of human fusses, ear rubs and belly tickles!

After all that lovely fun and attention, it was back into work mode again. First a workywalkies around the Universe City to find the bus stop again, then the bus ride - but, we didn't go straight back to the train station. Instead, we got off in town and I had to work really hard to take Mum around the big huge shoppyplace. First stop here was a human yummyery for a quick lie down under the table, then to a big huge shop full of clicketyfingerstoys and talkybones. I managed to sneak in a lie down under a big table while Mum did a whole load of yacketying. Then we had to find our way out of the shoppyplace and back to the train station. Mum got a bit disorientated and had to ask for directions. A lady behind a desk told her the way out of the shoppyplace. Once again, I had taken in those directions and executed them perfectly! Once outside though, Mum was still a little unsure of the way to the station. I guided her to a man who was sitting on the floor all wrapped up in a sleepysnuggle thing. He needed a bit of my love! I gave him my love and he gave Mum the directions we needed. A good swap methinks! We left him with his mouth up at the corners and we found our way straight to the station.

A nice manhuman gave us directions to the right place to wait for our train then, when it arrived, I showed Mum the way to the door and then to a seat. That gave me another brief chance for a snooze. When the voice in the box told us we were approaching Newbury, I got up and nudged Mum. She put my harness back on and I took her to the door ready to get off when it opened. Once outside the station, I then guided Mum up the road, down under the tunnels, then back up again. Then we found Dad with the car.

A brief ride in the car took us to the big snazzy bus where I got my dinner. That was just enough sustenance to keep me going through the evening of yet more fusses and admiration from all the maximinihumans who come to visit the bus. The little playful meet and greet with Rolo was fun. Rolo came to visit the bus and I got to hop off for a few moments to say doggyhello!

Now I really need my sofasnuggles with Mum. I think she is nearly as tired as me!

Photo of me play-bowing to Rolo the Pug x.


Monday, 17 April 2017

That's all the Reward I Get!!!


OUT OF ORDER! MEAN. ROTTEN. BEASTIEMUMMY!

I thought I was taking her for a lovely normal workywalkies. I even thought she was being super nice to me by letting me take her into Pets At Home. She even allowed me to take her to the yummies aisle and gave me an opportunity to do a bit of hoovering - not a lot, but some is better than none! I met a little girly Springer Spaniel called Storm - assistance dog to a nice ladyhuman in a wheelieseat. She had persuaded her mum to go to the yummies aisle too! Well, we working dogs have to make sure we get our due rewards! I then took Mum to the checkout and then to the little room at the side. She did a bit of yacketying with the ladyhumans in there and then we left.

I then took her around Lidl's, helped her find the carrots and the yoghurts, followed by Jerry's checkout. I like Jerry. He gives me a nice ear rub whenever I take Mum to his checkout.

I guided Mum all the way back to our floatyboatyhome, with the shopping in the bag on her back. I sat and waited patiently for my carrot. I got my carrot and took it out of her way to munch.

Not long afterwards, I got to take Daddy back to Pets At Home. Wowwww! I thought. What a fabulous day! Two trips to the bestest shop in town! How wrong was I? Yes, it was a second visit there ......but not to the shop as such......I got taken into that little room again. This time, Dad handed me over to the ladyhumans and he abandoned me!

I GOT FROTHED! AND SQUIRTED WITH WARM RAIN. AND HUFFERFUFFED. AND THEN SCRAPED AND POOFED! HOOOOOOWWWWWWLLLLLLLL! HOW MEAN WAS THAT TRICK?!!!

Then, when Dad came back for me and took me home again, Mum had the audacity to greet me with "Oooh! You smell gorgeous now Oaks!" HARRRRRUMPH!

Sunday, 16 April 2017

Broken Collar...


Heehee! I may just have snuck in a quick dip in the river on the way to church this morning. I am not entirely convinced Mum was absolutely overjoyed with me - but it was fun!

You see, we went early with Dad in the car. He had to go early to get set up with his dumdumdum-longnecked- longwhiskered-noise stick thing. Rather than hanging around while he did all that, I took Mum on a lovely workywalkes. We went off around the block, but then discovered that 'find the bin' led on to a twitten into a park. Well....that was a pleasant discovery! And we had time to kill.....so......I did my bestest 'sit' with my bestest 'please Mummy' look. It worked! She removed my harness and lead and I got to 'Go play'. Well, I successfully lulled her into a false sense of security by sticking close by for a few minutes.....but then.....that river just forced me in for a paddle.....ahem! Well....it would have been rude not to check it out wouldn't it? I didn't go all the way in .... not quite....only half way up .....only my belly was wet.....Ooooh! it was just labrador spa facilities! I had to do it!

I did do my best to dry off by having a superb game of chase with Chewbacca the Labradoodle x lurcher. He was super fast and bouncy and great fun. Sadly, the fun had to end when it was time to take Mum back to the church service and Chewy had to go home. Huff! It was good while it lasted though. I was almost dry by the time I had to lie down through all the human howling.

Next came a short car ride back to the boat, but we didn't stay there - only long enough for Dad to put away his dumdumdumstick and for Mum to visit the spending room. Then we set off on a mega workywalkies. It was great! I got to strut my stuff right the way to the other side of town - then all around a huge big building. That was a bit boring - nothing edible to find - but I did get to pop in a couple of power naps on carpets while Mum and Dad gazed around. Then came the long workywalkes back again across town - but not yet back home! We went to a human yummyery instead. I didn't get any yummies but I was glad of the bowl of water that the nice ladyhuman brought for me! I sloshed that quite successfully across the floor! Heehee!

The final workywalkes brought us back to our floatyboatyhome and a good bone-munching session!

I just took Mum out again - just outside for a wee. That would have been a rather mundane little outing if it hadn't been for my collar breaking! That gave me a few moments to go running to the manhuman who was there. At least, I started to run towards him, but then, just as Mum called me back, I noticed that he was using a squirtysnake to squirt the grass. I ran back to Mum. She thought I was being super obedient so I got a treat and a 'good boy to come back'. I think that yummy was much more appealling that the squirtysnake!

Freerun! Boy oh Boy!!!!





Workywalkies into town. Red-&-white-stripeyshop open! Yayy! I got a bone! Mum also got some mouth-drip-provocation too but she wouldn't let me check it out!
Long car ride.
Debbi and Ryan's huge garden.
My huge bone.
Two huge carrots.
A freerun on Hounslow common.

A good day methinks!

During the freerun Debbi yelped. A long, thin wiggly stick slithered off into the long grass. Mum wouldn't let me investigate. We left that area rather quickly. The rest of the freerun was great though. Hounslow Common is huge. Loads of weemail hubs to connect with!

4 photos.
Two of me enjoying my freerun on Hounslow Heath
Two of me enjoying my huge bone in Debbi & Ryan's huge garden.




Friday, 14 April 2017

Howling and Walkies...


We went workywalkies. Then apparently we went witness-walkies too. I thought it was just another workywalkies with oooooodles of other humans joining in. Well, I was working and we was walking......

The first bit of workywalkies was into town and then into a big church building. I wriggled my way under the long wooden human sitting stick and snoozed through all the human howling and yacketying. Then everybody left the building and we all walked together through town. A manhuman at the front was carrying a huge tree thing with just one branch sticking out each side. The walkies finished at another church building and, after some more human howling outside, we went inside and the humans munched some dotty flat balls with an X on top. I did hope for some hooverings but Mum wouldn't let me. She said the dots were something called raisins, which are poisonous to dogs. That's not fair! They didn't smell poisonous! Huff!

After all that, we set off on another workywalkies - back through town the long way. When we got to where we should turn left to the floatyboatykennel, Dad left us. I tried desperately to take Mum to follow him but she was most insistent that we carry on walking. I cried to Daddy, but he just kept on walking away - towards home. For a few moments, I registered my protest at losing my daddy by putting on a serious plod. I got over it though and we carried on for a lovely workywalkies all the way through the industrial estate, then up to a bridge and back down and along the towpath. That last bit was lovely! The industrial estate is a good challenge for me guiding Mum as there are lots of downkerbs and upkerbs and other hazards to negotiate. The towpath is easy in comparison; all I have to do is keep Mum from wandering too far either side. Too far one way and she would get a faceful of prickly green sticks. Too far the other way and we would both be swimming ....hmmm.....I quite fancy that idea! Maybe not on harness though!

Whilst in town, we did go past the red-and-white-stripes shop but it was closed. So, no new bone today. I had to content myself with a big juicy carrot and a cow's tail. That will have to do for today!

Thursday, 13 April 2017

My World has Ended...


I have a very serious problem. I really don't know how I am going to go on. This is terrible. Disastrous. Catastrophic (or should that be Dogastrophic?)

I HAVE RUN OUT OF BONE! HHHHOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWLLLLLLL.........

I guided Mum around town earlier and we went past the red-and-white striped shop but we didn't go in for such an essential supply!

What am I going to do?

Please......someone.....heeeeellllpppp......

Wednesday, 12 April 2017

I was Wrong...


Humph! What a con!

I took Mummy workywalkies this morning. A nice long workywalkies without Dad. He disappeared off in the car. The workywalkies even included enduring ooooooodles of that 'browsing' thing in Dullelm and Beeancue. After all that came the command 'Find the bus stop'. Well that sounds exciting. I thought. So I strutted off to guide Mum to the bus stop. We sat and waited for a little while. That was fine. Then I got really excited when the bus came along. It was the Bus of Hope that we go out on sometimes to meet and greet all the maximinihumans. Dad was driving it! What an adventure. I thought.

I was wrong! We rode non-stop to a huge bus-vet-place. We waited there while some manhumans poked and prodded some things inside a box in the upsteps bit of the bus, then we rode all the way back again. That was it! The exciting (???) outing! Humph!

At least I got to meet and greet the manhumans and then I got to water a tree there before we left.

It was a good workywalkies. The rest of the day has given me good chance to almost finish my bone-demolition work.

Tuesday, 11 April 2017

I am SUCH a Cool Dude!

Visitors! Lots of visitors! Human ones and doggy ones! Yessss! My buddies came to play! Shadow and Tizzy came to play! Yayyyyyy!

First of all though, I had to take Daddy walkies while Mum did some strange thing with two round squidgy flat things she made yesterday. When we came back they were stacked together with fluffy white stuff in between and on top plus red pimply sort-of-triangularish shaped / heart shaped things all over the top.

Then, as we got back, our first visitors arrived. They were humanfriends Peter and Lin from another floatyboatyhome. Actually, after initial waggy greetings, I just chilled out with my bone while the humans sat and munched that grand-design red pimply blob topped yummy, and did the inevitable interminable yacketyyacketyyacketyyackyackyacking.

Shortly after they left us, I had to take Mummy workywalkies, with Daddy tagging along too. We went along the towpath, then across a beastie busy road to a human yummyery. We didn't go straight in though. Instead, we waited outside for a few minutes, then a car arrived. We went towards that car and Oh My! Tail in mega-wag mode! My buddies Shadow and Tizzy got out of that car! Oh, I guess I should mention that they did have their human mummy, Chrissie with them too! We all went to the little park just behind the yummyery and I heard those lovely words: "Go Play"!!! Well.....I didn't waste a moment! Loony zoomies with Tizzy! Yaaayyhaaayyyy! I tried to get Shadow to play too and I know he wanted to but he is too old and poorly! He just can't do it, so I ran up to him from time to time - just to say 'Hi' and check up on him! Then I gave Tizzy another run for her life! Tizzy is quite senior too but she is still a whizzy Tizzy! We had some great fun! Patt way through this time of loonying, a manhuman appeared at the other end of the park. I stood and watched for a moment to check that I wan't mistaken. I wasn't! It was my humanpal Pete! Tizzy spotted him at the same time and we raced to get to him. I beated her! I got to her daddy before she did! Heehee! I got the first kisses in! I didn't manage to nick his hat this time though!

Next, we all went into the yummery garden and endured the torture of the humans noshing while we just had to dream of our dinners! We stayed waaaaayyyy past my dinner time too! It was just awful! I was wasting away by the minute! Starved! Emaciated! Weaker and weaker! I was so weak I had to ride in Pete's big high-up car back to our floatyboatyhome. Dad rode in the front and Mum went with Chrissie in her car, with Shadow and Tizzy.

Back aboard our home, I STILL had to wait for my dinner while they all did yet more yacketying! Whimper....... I was ready to eat myself! Finally - eventually - just before I passed out from total malnutrition  - Mum actually got round to getting my dinner! Phew! I have survived! Just!

Photo of me in harness, inside the human yummyery, wearing Mum's dark eye windows.

Monday, 10 April 2017

Not a Bad Day!


Not sure if I've been swizzed......Mum's talkybone tells her we did nearly 5 miles workywalkies today - but most of that was a constant stream of 'find left' 'go right' 'about turn' 'straight on' 'stop' 'wait'......aaaallll the way around Sainsbury's!

Ok....the walkies there was good - I can't complain about that. It did include some yummy rewards for finding the button at the crossings. Ooh! And a big 'Clever boy' fuss and a yummy for when we reached the gate to get out of the floatyboatykennelplace. Mum asked me to 'find the button'. Not only did I find it, but I hup-touched it for her too and the gate opened for us! Heehee!

So....yes....workywalkies around the streets to get to Sainsbury's was good. All that to-ing and fro-ing and back again-ing inside there though......hmmmm....not sure......let me think......

I have to guide not only Mum but also the wheeliecage that she puts all the yummies into. I walk beside it, we walk slowly, Mum tells me which direction she wants to go and I allow for the extra width and steer us round. That's all a good challenge.

I get to sneak in an occasional sniff to investigate the yummies on offer - I especially like to inspect the big blobs of meat in the cold cupboards. So many of them are at just the perfect height for me. I'm sure I'm supposed to help Mum select them all......but...Nope! All the thanks I get is a firm 'Oi! Get your shnozzle away!' Humph!
I often manage to woo a few passing shoppers into making a fuss of me. I think I'm getting good at the 'please pity me' sad look. It works! Especially whilst Mum is occupied staring at the shelves to try to find the items she wants. That gives me ideal opportunities to practice the look on any passing sympathiser!

I occasionally get to hoover a morsel or two off the floor. I failed on that one today.

I occasionally manage to persuade Mum to let me guide her to the best aisle - the doggy yummies dept. I failed on that one today.
I usually manage to guide Mum to the carrots. I succeeded on that one today.

Occasionally, when I take Mum to the carrots, I manage to select one for myself. This is very rare though - this blimmin noseband prevents success most times. Today, I failed on this but Mum did get a nice big juicy specimen.

I usually get to greet the checkout bleepy person. Today, the checkout bleepyman not only wanted a greeting - but he left his bleeper and came round for right full on proper fuss session! Yayyy!

After the bleeping checkout session, I got that big juicy carrot! Yummmmmmyyyy!

On balance, perhaps it wasn't such a bad workywalkies after all!

This evening, Mum has been doing something very worrying: She got a little bottle thing and plopped some of it's contents into her eyes! Then her eyes were doing big leakies. I got all worried. I watched her very carefully. Why on earth would she want to make her own eyes leak? She made a fuss of me and told me its all OK. She just has sore eyes and is trying to make them unsore. I'm not letting her out of my sight though - I want to be sure she is truly OK. I even kept her under scrutiny when she went into the spending room.

Sunday, 9 April 2017

Yawnnnnn

Snoozy Sunday.

Very welcome.

Just three and a half miles of workywalkies in three stints.

A snooze at church. A snooze under the table while Mum and Dad munched (and a couple of morsels that fell my way - yummmmy - apparently I like steak!) and an afternoon of relaxed snoozing while Mum and Dad did a whole load of that peculiar 'tidying and sorting out' thing.

I then took Dad out for an evening download walkies and came back to a shiny clean floor - Mum must have been doing her floor-stroking thing again!

Now, please excuse me. I have more snoozing to do.....

Photo of me lying on my bed (on the sofa) with my head on my teddy (Humphrey).


An Under-Table Day!


I have been under the table for quite a lot of today! Well...different tables actually!

This morning, we set off in the car to a church in Reading. There, Mum did a whole load of yacketying using one of those lollipops with a long tail. Dad was doing clicketyfingersing to make pictures of me appear on a big white wall. There were lots of humans there listening - many of them sitting in wheelieseats. Our boaty humanfriends, John and Barbara were there too. I curled up under the table to keep Dad's back paws warm.

Next, we all went into a different room where I was under another table while they all munched their lunch. I got to do a bit of hoovering at the end! Yummm!

No tables in the next bit of the day - just a big park! Yippeeeee! There were lots of very noisy big whirly-around-up-and-down things and swingy things and fly-up-high things and humans were riding on them all! Dad disappeared off into the midst of all that cocophany with his one-eyed-clickybox. I took Mum for a wander around the trees - that was much more civilised! When we reunited with Dad he took over my job and so I got to explore the trees and woods properly. Afterwards, we walked back to the car and Dad fumbled around in his bag and his pockets, then we all went back to the noisy place. We then spent quite a while wandering around in circles - in and out between all the twirlers and flyers and other things. Mum yipped to a ladyhuman inside a kind of circle-pen thing with lots of yellow things with hooks on their heads. Then we went to a big kiosk. The manhuman inside there, after a bit of yipping, handed over Dad's shinysticktags. Then we went back to the car again - this time, we got in and rode back to our floatyboatyhome!

After my dinner and a bit of a bone-gnawing session, we went out again. This time it was for a nice long workywalkies around Newbury. Then I had another under-the-table session! I just snoozed down there while a set of humans did all sorts of things up on a big high floor at the front. There were lots of tables with lots of humans sitting around them and, at the end, they all banged their front paws together. That meant it was time to workywalkies all the way home again!

No table to lie under now - just my sofa bed - night night!

Friday, 7 April 2017

I Lost my Piggy!



7 miles workywalkies. 9 locks. 4 swingbridges. 1 swimming session with a passing choccy lab (she was having way too much fun without me - I simply had to go join in!). Plenty of meetings and greetings of humans and doggypals. A few sessions of chilling out on the grass. Now I am absolutely compooperated. Mum says I need to muster some energy for a download in a minute. Let me think about that one........Nope! Can't be bothered!

It has been a fabtabulous day! Even my grunty pink pig went for a swim......down the back of a lock gate! Oops! Thanks for rescuing him Daddy! He does look a bit bedraggled now and Mum has banished him to the roof until he can be put in the frothymonster machine - hoooooowwwwllllll! Poor gruntypig!
Photo of me - absolutely sparko on the sofa - my head has slid backwards off of Mum's leg and I am squidged between Mum and the back cushion of the sofa.


Thursday, 6 April 2017

I've been a Clever Boy again! (Aren't I always???)


"You are so clever!" Mum said that several times today! How many more times will she have to say before she realises it is quite right!

We went workywalkies in Reading first - around some shops and with a visit to a human yummyery. That was the first observation of my cleverness: I took Mum to the human spending room and, when we came back out, she thought we needed to turn left. She told me to 'Find the way out. Find left' Well, I knew those two didn't fit together so I gave her 'the look' (a glance back over my shoulder) and turned right and headed straight to the door! "Ok smartybum! You are so clever!" Well, my smartybum hit that floor pretty smartish - ready to receive proof of how good I was! Treat duly accepted, we headed off out onto the streets again.

"Find the crossing" - no problem. "Find the button" - A quick hup-touch to show Mum exactly where the button was, got me my next 'Clever boy' treat.

"Find the car" was the next one - I confess I may have slowed down a tad on approach - well - walking is much more fun! But I did find the car - and.....well....OK a treat for hopping in is worth having!

The next stop was at the huge humanvets place. We have been here before (apart from when Mum stayed in a bed in a different bit of it - that was different). We've been to the Eye Clinic before and that was where we had to go today. We went in the big doorway and I instantly recognised where we were. Mum and Dad were hesitating - trying to read the squiggles on the walls (well, Dad was trying to read them anyway). I didn't need squiggles! I just tugged Mum straight up the stairs, turned left, around the corridors and straight to the door of the Eye Clinic! "You really have got your smartypants on today haven't you?! You are SOOO clever Oaks!" I got lots of fuss and yummies for that! Heehee!

After being led into several different rooms and having some tests and lots of yacketying, Mum was lost! Really disorientated. I sorted her out though. No hesitation......a faultless walk back to the entrance and then on back to the car! More yummies! I do like the taste of being clever!

Mum was happy too - that is always good! Apparently the humanvetman has confirmed that her vision loss is nothing for Debbi or Rosie to worry about - it is not caused by anything that they might get. I don't understand but I do like it when Mum's mouth is up at the corners!

This evening, we have been out again at humanfriends' home. This meant that I had to be clever again when we returned. Our floatyboatyhome is quite a long way along a completely dark towpath. No problem to me! We are now safely aboard and I think I am very ready for my sofasnuggles with my Mummy!